


this is my story

by kaisgirl



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-13
Updated: 2017-11-15
Packaged: 2019-02-01 19:51:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12711801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaisgirl/pseuds/kaisgirl
Summary: growing up they didn't give me any hope of achieving my dreams . well this is my story





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> just my new idea of a story this is the first part

You know what they say don’t you. They always tell you that you shouldn’t that you can’t, well don’t listen to them. You can do anything you set your mind to. I know this as they told me that I couldn’t play again well see I wasn’t having any of that, you want to know why, I will tell you see the game is the only thing that I have that makes me happy it’s the one thing I love the most you see. So when they told me that I couldn’t play again well I turned round and cried until I couldn’t cry no more. Then when I was all cried out and feeling sorry for myself and my crushed dreams I decided that I was going to prove them wrong and show them that I can and will play again. Shocked was the understatement when I happened to prove them wrong. See they had no faith whereas I had plenty of faith that I could and would play again. What is life if you don’t live it the way you were meant to? I mean I am sure I would have come to love something else if I had given myself the opportunity to but see I didn’t want to I just wanted to play the game and feel myself come alive. You know if you do something in life and feel alive when you’re doing it then are you even living. I would suspect not. How do you know what that feeling is you ask, well that feeling is the one of upmost joy, one that bleeds passion and commitment and one that just oozes contentment. If you feel all of these then you are on the right path.

It all started when I was little and fell in love with the beautiful game of soccer. I know you may laugh at that but to me soccer was and still is everything. I think I knew the first time that I kicked a soccer ball that I knew my future was in soccer. If you had of heard me then you probably would have scoffed like everyone else in the sleepy little town I grew in did. I mean they all told me to give it a rest with my exclamations that I was going to be the next women’s soccer star, well I didn’t stop I set out to prove them wrong. When everyone said I should give up and have aspirations to be a doctor or a lawyer I just shrugged them off and stood firm in my ambition to be a soccer star or just a plain old soccer player I mean everyone wants to be a star in there profession and I was no different. I mean if I can shrug off the suggested career choice others want for me then I best do my best to achieve stardom in my chosen field as there suggestions where all great just not for me you know. I already knew that I had a mountain to climb in terms of achieving my dream of being a soccer player as I was in a place none would choose to look for the next lot of soccer talents and especially for a future women’s star as the town doesn’t even have a women’s team.


	2. Chapter 2

I mean life has never been easy for me in fact my life has been pretty bad I have always had obstacles, setbacks and personal issues to over come. I mean to some of you my life has been better then yours but let me tell you now that my life has been anything like straightforward. I mean I may look all happy and like life is great but it isn’t its anything but. The beautiful game has been my only constant in life. You may scoff at that but how can any of you question me and say I am over reacting when none of you have lived my life or walked in shoes as they say. So though I know some of you will write me off and tell me that I need to get a grip, I personally respect your opinion but I will not let you belittle what I have been through. When I think about my past I always tell myself not to dwell on it as you can not change the past all you can do is learn from it. I mean I look back with a grimace but that is because back then I wasn’t living I was barely surviving. When things got too much I would always have soccer I mean in a way soccer saved my life. I mean if I didn’t have soccer growing up I probably wouldn’t be here today. Yeah today life is better. That is only because I have realized that I needed to start living and not just go through life surviving. So yes I know life can get better and will get better but I am just taking it one step at a time at the moment.

Soccer has always been there for me it even saved me which I am really grateful for. I will always give my all to soccer as it has given me so much in life that I feel like I owe so much to the game and now that I have them the fans. Sometimes I feel like I will never be able to repay those who believed in me. I mean right now I am not having that good of a time with soccer. I mean people criticising my every decision from moving from my home town team to another but what none of you people want to believe is that that one decision was one of the single hardest things I had ever had to do in my life. But also I am stuck in a place inside my head where I tell myself that I am not good enough as I am been overlooked and underutilised by the national team. Yes I can understand the coach wanting to test new players but I know that I am one of the better players one of the best and yet it pains me to not get that call up. I mean coach is entitled to her opinion which I can respect but coach seems to be in her own little world right now. I know the fans are flipping out on twitter about it every time I am omitted from the team. I know the coach says I still have a future on the team but it is hard to maintain that belief within myself at the moment.

Sometimes I think I should just give in and then at other times I know that actually I need to go out onto that soccer pitch and remind the national team coach just what she is missing by not picking me. Sometimes I feel like soccer has fallen out of love with me but then I remember that I have my fans who love me and want to see me smash it on the field of play. I also remember that I have my own dues to pay to the game that saved me and that I am proving all those wrong who said that I could never play at the top level and those that said that I would never play again. At times like this where the going get tough I grit my teeth and grin and bear it. I will always love the game even when I feel the game no longer loves me. I just have to remember that I need to live the life I want for me and not for anyone else. I also need to remember that I need to continue living and not go back to just surviving like I have in the past.

 I mean as someone told me lately that everyone deserves to fly. I'm through accepting limits cause someone says they're so some things I cannot change but til I try, I'll never know! Too long I've been afraid. I think I’ll try defying gravity. I've heard it said, that people come into our lives for a reason bringing something we must learn. And we are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them. And we help them in return. Well, I don't know if I believe that's true But I know I'm who I am today because I knew you. That is what I try to use as my motto when the going gets tough you have to love the life lessons and the meanings within the songs of Wicked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading this and sorry if you don't like that i have used song lyrics as inspiration but the ones i used have helped me alot. :)


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